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RA : Residental Advisor – basically the RA is an upperclassman student that supervises the floor, RAs also go on nightly rounds to ensure that
various rules are followed. They can also organize floor activities, and are also meant to be someone you can go to if you need to talk.
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WE had our mandatory floor meeting tonight, regarding the “hate crimes” committed on our floor against our RA. It’s really sad, but in spite of
being here six months, I don’t know about ¾ of the guys on my floor. At this point though given another six months, I don’t think I’d be good friends with the rest anyway. But that’s beyond the point, things have happened on our floor: on our floor’s bathroom, somebody wrote some insults against our RA and drew in graphic pictures to match. I haven’t been on the best terms with my RA; I’ve had a lot of grievances against him over the past and current semester, and I’ve imagined a wide range of unspeakables to get back at him. But after today’s meeting, I almost felt apologetic. My RA is still a rigid idiot, but there are things that I could be doing better to ensure the system works.

I had previously regarded the “vandalism” on our floor, with bitter humor; that bastard deserves what he gets for his draconian enforcement of codes as if it were his bible. But I suppose what got me was the fact that it took weeks before anything was done about the vandalism, and that it wasn’t anyone on the floor but the RA himself that reported it.

I’m usually all for the “casual overlooking” of rules if it helps at all; I don’t like the idea of having to use go through legal force when it is unnecessary. That hasn’t changed—but today’s meeting has brought me a little bit of respect for rules themselves, and not simply doing what I want. Lately, I think I’ve been falling to a lot of things I shouldn’t be…

I’m not going to explain any further, except that I’m impressed at the way this university has taken measures to ensure that we learn important matters of morality without involving the full blown judicial system. Yes there are immature kids still around, and yes even I have a lot of growing to do. And I’m thankful for what the school is doing to try to drive that point where it needs to be.

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This weekend was awesome

And so was the week

The Coke, one week later

 

The song in the background is from the Final Fantasy X-2 piano collections. Memories of Light and Waves… such a beautiful song, and i WILL learn to play it over the next three years. such hopes…

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2/19/2005 – 1:30 AM
The two bottles sat between us…

“Come on… just drink it.”

“I don’t know though… not drinking has probably been the greatest committment I’ve made over this past year. A whole… 369 days now, and I don’t know… I know it’s not a big deal but I’d still feel like I’m throwing something away. Hold on, lemme make a call…”

[Dialing… 630-687-****]

“Hey dude, were you sleeping?”

“No, but I was about to. Oh, did you do it yet?”

“I have the stuff… but I dunno… I don’t know if I should.”

“Well, think about it this way, if I were you, I’d drink if it I knew I could control myself. And considering how it’s been a whole year, I think you’ve already proven to yourself that you can.”

“Ah… oh okay… thanks. I’ll talk to you later”

[Ended call… 0:28]

“Okay fine… I’ll do it.”

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I had completely forgotten the taste of Coca Cola… when I opened the bottles, it smelled so foreign… it was weird. I couldn’t believe where I was, what I was doing. But I did it. And did it bigtime…

Yep… all for me (the other two are in the fridge)

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There was another big event this weekend:

Check it!

Yep $20 t-shirts!

The concert was awesome, and now i owe a few ppl big BIG dinners. Haha–but it was worth it! (Japanese composers are so FOBby)

There is a certain level of irony to this world… something that I will never comprehend. Yet, what never ceases amaze me is when things
seem so incredibly sensitive and convoluted but with just a simple show of honesty, or even a very candid conversation can bring things back to managable levels. Thank GOD for true friends!

…and I’m back home again… its 4th weekend straight not spent at my own school. I’d write more, but I need to be physically ready for tomorrow, so I’ll sleep. But here’s something I wrote a couple days ago… and still applies now…

February 17th, 2005

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03:32 am – Busy I’ve been so busy lately, being really productive and getting so much work done. It seems like every hour of my life is scheduled to do something, be it classes, meals, meetings, even leisure time; it’s crazy how organized my (ideal) life seems to be becoming. Of course I don’t quite follow what I’ve assigned for myself, with ditching classes, skipping meals, and arriving late to meetings becoming equally as much a part of my routine. But, I’ve been surviving, thriving even. I feel like an engineer already, making the most “efficient” use of the limited time that I have. It seems all good… but something’s missing. As far back as I can remember, appreciated disorganization. Take one look at my room at home, and you’ll see the degree of how much I leave nature and my own tendencies to let things become what they’re meant to be. Even with my time, my ideal life would be to have enough free time to do whatever I feel I want, whenever. I think that’s somehow what attracted me to the English/Rhetoric major in the first place, being able (or not) to depend on the whims of creativity, and the chances upon my experience to be my main life’s drive. Yet, I knew I could do so much more, and slowly, I’m becoming a more perfect engine set for production. I’ve set my direction for now, but now I’m beginning to wonder where I’m headed. And of course, I’m wondering this once again as I was lying in bed, about to fall asleep. I miss… ah… the old adventure…