Today’s meaning and tonight’s significance couldn’t be more straightforward The night before already feels like a lifetime ago. I have so much to be thankful for. (tired beyond belief)

 Post-midnight tonight will be carved forever in my memory—I guess I know how Jason felt when he moved on a full week ago—but today was huge—and once again the gathering was amazing. Not quite a bittersweet celebration—that was how summer started with our graduation. I remember us gathered at Taco Bell in our gowns, eating burritos while the Latino dudes laughed at us. With that night began this eternally long era of summer. Like senior year, it felt as if it would go on forever.

And now the end is here—and it’s finally hit me. The “next step” that countless times we’ve toasted, cheered, and dedicated our nights to, is right here—starting with this morning. Just like Prom offered closure to high school, this night was to close the book on what was by far, the best eras of my life. And I couldn’t think of a better place to do it than where this summer started—at our little Taco Bell on Ogden . The night was more somber and harder than graduation, but just as meaningful. To gather it all in, I felt the urge to step back for a bit, and for a while, I sat observing our tables at T-Bell. And it was truly a sight to hold in memory—and I will forever remember. Then, I felt the urge to jump in—so I did.

Haha, I remember Mr. Ried (my old math teacher) saying how last impressions are the lasting impressions; the way tonight went… I think it could have gone on forever—and for a few brief moments, while we were all circled outside Taco Bell, the meaning of fellowship was revealed. And that meaning will go on with all of us to our God-designated places anywhere. I’ve never felt such a strong bond of familiarity among friends of an era.

And perhaps these bonds go beyond eras. My dad said that the friends you make in high school are the ones you’ll keep for the rest of your life. That truth brings me a lot of comfort.

Yawn… lol, I’d better start packing. Starting with this computer. UIUC, here we come!

So months have become weeks to days and now, mere hours. 16 hours from now, I depart this home. Yesterday was an amazing night–what a way to remember our times.

What a change.

Dedicated to “The Next Step” and new beginnings.

[This entry is dedicated to those who have gone before us.]

I think for the first time ever… I’m beginning to feel distant from what we once were. As if I’ve suddenly found another dimension to float off into, while those left behind keep running, where we used to go.

The first of my close friends left today. It was a goodbye of the deepest kind, not holding on, not letting go, not doing anything that would hinder either of us from becoming the best we can be. I shed no tears–for the moment was neither sad, nor happy; just smiles of parting, knowing that no distance from the Heart, nor ANYTHING else , will hinder us from being EVERYTHING that we can be. And how can one be sad?! when we know that a dear friend is out there being the best he can be? (and to confirm this, I have just received a call from The One who has been sent ahead) Overshadowing every other emotion, is one that I can describe only as sheer jubilation, with a tinge of pride. Like, damn—I miss ‘em so much, but nothing can take away from this joy.

This is the first step in accepting the present, next we rule the future.

Future!!!, our forerunner has gone, and has brought news of cheer and victory that lies ahead. And we who follow shall embrace it, with nothing to stop us. And what else is there… there is hope. An infinite hope that cannot die.

I can’t wait for college.

*****     *****     *****     *****

Tina Arena – The Flame ( Sydney Olympics 2000)

Is this the hope of the world in my hands
I’ll take this moment, to be all that I can
Look to you to see the future
Stronger and free

Today we will show who we are
We are the earth
And we’re together again
My friends, will you show us the way
We travel on, guided by the flame

The fire within makes you reach out to the goal
You redefine the best, by stretching the soul
A world in need of inspiration
And looks to you and me

Today we will show who we are
We are the earth
And we’re together again
My friends, will you show us the way
We travel on, guided by the flame

Since ancient times we’ve come together
In the light of the flame
To stand for all the world to see
People reaching out to greatness
And all we can be

Today we will show who we are
We are the earth
Together again
Today you will show who you are
The best on earth, and you bring the world together again
My friends, you have shown us the way
Look to your heart
You will find the flame

Amazing song–they should have played this at our graduation.