I. Am. So. Very. Confused out of my mind.

It’s late so I’m not gonna write much more, even though my past record suggests that if I don’t deliberate this now, I never will. So here’s the dealizite:

I felt so sure as of last night, between what fascinates me and what satisfies me, and I now have absolutely no coherent idea of what I want to do anymore. It’s just like that. That’s not to say that  i don’t have any ideas–contrary, I have a LOt of things I want to do. But to dedicate my life-career to, that future remains behinds the clouds. Maybe if I write it all down, it’ll start to make more sense…

Cognitive science.
Artificial Intelligence
Material Science and Engineering / with an emphasis on biomaterials and polymers
Some other sort of engineering…
Oh and of course, English.

I think it’s kind of funny that I’m going back to engineering. In spite of liking physics, biology, (though not math) for some reason, I deliberately strayed awat from engineering. Nanotech was always fascinating, and biotech/bioengineering… so much stuff. Somehow I think it might be that it was TOO enticing… that I just wanted to break away and do my own thing… which turned out to be English. Neither being really bad, or really good at it, I could take it and float along… of course… I never intended to “float along” at all. Now, after a full semester of contemplation and exploration, that future seems more and more like… a misuse of precious time.

As for engineering… that is a little bigger of a realization. I’ve learned over the past few–[expand later]

Cognitive Neuroscience. It has a nice ring to it. Even Kaidi says it sounds smart. Lol, of course it *sounds* smart it’s all about brains. It’s cool stuff. Really–who wouldn’t be fascinated at understanding the Mind?

But acade—actualyl ya know what–I’m gonna give this a break. Yeah. Listening to Vienna Teng, I have lost all motivation to continue writing for the time being. But let’s just say that what I thought was my future has now gone the way of “web-dropped course”.

On a more lovelier note, check out this awesome site!
http://artpad.art.com/?ialr24z49fc (by kaidi)