Year 3 – Chapter 8 – The chaos of daily survival

Xander’s College Life: Year 3

Chapter 8 – The chaos of daily survival

Okay, so I have two CS assignments to finish, so I’ll make this quick.

For those that asked, the song that was on previous is called “Interlude” by a guy who goes by SVC. He originally meant for it to be in an independent film, but that didn’t work out—so he’s selling the song online. I found it on the background of the Global Orgasm initiative website. Don’t ask, just read.

That said, it’s scary how quickly life can change—or at least, the future of a whole semester. I suppose it’s no secret anymore; Cathy broke her leg, and amidst other complications, having missed three weeks of school, has elected to withdraw for the term. It’s scary how a single slip can change the course of an entire year. Then again, many unexpected life events are like that… life/death even; we’re like fragile flickering flames in a vast windy uncaring universe. Sometimes we live so vigorously, that we forget that that something so small, a lapse in judgment, a mistake, a minor slipup, can… well, do quite a lot of harm.

Quite a paradox; somehow it seems like a grave injustice given the infinite meaning our lives hold.

Or simply a fact of existence. I sat in at an actuarial class today (to enrich my education? Okay fine, my main reason for being there was to finish my ECE 329 homework), and for that moment, saw that life and death… really are just statistics. Whether it’s the likelihood of death between insurance periods (0.02 for those in a certain coverage group), for some people, it’s part of their jobs to determine how high the death benefit needs to be to generate the most profits. Also, a fact of life, but still, a little morbid, don’t you think?

But alas, it’s all economics, and of course, I have nothing against actuaries—it’s still work that benefits our society.

What does all this mean? If this is life, then where to all the other infinite-valued concepts, like time or love, fit in? I don’t get why I’m having such a hard time reconciling this reality now, I’ve never had a problem with it before. Why am I suddenly acting like a disillusioned idealist?

Well, I think I’ve spent enough time thinking in terms of numbers, I have to get this sucker to spin around a mesh at a variable radius, while also getting an auto-centering camera to move in spherical coordinates according to user input.


See ya, and stay safe! Don’t become a statistic!