Category: life

Who needs names when you have memes?

by skyrien

I had the most awesome fun discussions with some CouchSurfers last Friday. It was my first time hanging out with members of this massive community, and it was a great one. I swear, I think I’m developing a little bit of hippie-ness inside of me after living in Seattle for nearly a year. Meeting new people is so much fun, especially open-minded, accepting, less judgemental people that love expressing themselves, but also love listening just as much–sometimes I wonder why more of the world can’t be like this.

We spoke on all sorts of topic that somehow all seemed to point towards some common sense of spirit, be it a discussion on:

– American/Korean cultural imperialism across Asia
– A debate on linguistics and the relevance of the Sapir-Whorf hypothesis (which Zina claims has been disproven–whoooohooo!!!!)
– North Korea’s attempts to eliminate gov’t resistance by removing words that “fuel” oppositionm, and whether or not this is counter-productive since it creations social memes of generalized concepts
– The importance of language at communicating a movement of resistance to authority
– Whether or not Twitter’s “trending” topics are analogous to cultural memes outside of the web-context…
– Racism in Korea, Asia, and the *importance* of American imperialism to promote peace (i know Joyce would’ve loved this part of the discussion), and et cetera to infinity…) This could go on for so long about the awesome discussions we had, but from there, I gleaned a few important thoughts.

First, that I have this deep internal need to be social on an intellectual level. Sure, I have friends that I discuss politics, life, values, etc with, but not in a *long* time (at least since the debates on religion that I had with Nick/Jason) have I had that sense of making an epic scholarly journey through perspectives and life, but that was five years ago. I needed this discussion to spark my curiosity for now, and the future.

Second, (should I be starting a new paragraph???) I have a very strong sense of “sharing” what I believe and love with my friends, family, and the world. I knew this when I felt the joy of recommending a movie that moved me, or a story that somehow touched a part of my life, or even inviting a friend into a discussion that I passionately care about. That joy of sharing is so vital to my sense of contribution to the world, that if I didn’t have all these outlets to post Status Updates, Youtube / Article Links, Twitter updates, blog posts, I think I would be painting posters and hanging them off my apartment expressing the same. I had such happiness sharing ideas, listening to these peoples’ stories, that I knew I had to do it again. And I will.

Finally, I learned that in most places in my life, we highly-emphasize the importance of building relationships, building trust, and remembering names. We have this, “prove me your worth first, then we can be friends/collegues, etc…” attitude that is pervasely self-oriented, conceals personal agendas, and focuses on building “goodwill” i.e. the currency of soft-power. It might be necessary in social settings, but the CouchSurfing community blows that away completely. The hippiness that I loved was the implicit trust in people, that we can talk about personal details, share stories, without the concern of judgments or retributions because we all seemed to recognized that we were merely individuals, and while our common bond might be our language, there could have been any number of divergent lifestyles and viewpoints at that table. And somehow, it didn’t matter. I guess you kind of have to have this attitude, since people in this community come and go as fast as people you see on a bus. You might meet someone you could be best friends with, but their lives take them where they go, and that’s ok. Did I mention that after hours of passionate discussion that i hardly knew each others’ names, who they were, or where they came from? In the corporate world, asking someone’s name might have been an insult (“after this deep talk, you still don’t know my name?!”), but here, it wasn’t even necessary. As someone who can’t remember names for the life of me, I liked that :).

Anyway, the only point I wanted to make by this point is to be open, be sincere, accept those around you, and love thy neighbor. I remember reading once in a blog post a comment that some Brit had made, and it stuck with me as something to live by: “Live free and die free, fuck the powers that be, but respect your fellow man.”

Now there’s something I can live and die by.

Related Links:
– http://www.couchsurfing.org/

Social Mores of the 21st Century

by skyrien

I’ve realized why I’ve been tweeting and Facebook PSUing so much: Because right now, I have an excess of a desire to share awesome things that I’ve read and experienced! So, instead of cluttering up my friends’ Twitter feeds, Facebook home pages, and incessantly getting CAPCHA challenges from Facebook, I’ll make a compilation post of the various things that’ve taken up my attention for the day.

 First of all, I recommend everyone to immediately pick up the current edition of Wired, and read up on the “How to Behave: New Rules” section; besides being the best “How-to” from Wired in a long time, it’s a very revealing series of small articles about the social expectations of our techified / webified culture, and what to-do, what not-to-do. I love Wired. Seriously, it’s one of the most intelligent, well-written, relevant magazines in today’s age. I want it read at all my major Life Events.

 And for the rest of you, un-Wired people (or those who only enjoy freebies), here it is in Online form.

http://www.wired.com/culture/lifestyle/magazine/17-08/by_index

 They’re funny, short, and a refreshing read for everyone of this age. Here are links to my favorite ones:

Don’t Work All the Time — You’ll Live to Regret It

Never Broadcast your Relationship Status

Don’t Google-Stalk Before a First Date

Ignore the Ex on Facebook

Ditch the Headset

There’s No Such Thing as Too Many Friends

Texting in the Company of Others is OK

Don’t Blog or Tweet Anything With More Than Half a Million Hits

 What I appreciated most are about the articles, besides being well written are that each is solidly grounded in some body of academic research, and provides links to relevant content. I thought only Wikipedia gave you that kind of linking joy!

 Damn, reading all this is making me wonder about where to take my career from here. Everyone plays around online, enjoys good technology, and by working with web services as part of my daily life and job, I find it awesome that I’m in a position to be making a difference in how web services are used by people around the world. What to do with that position… is another story.

 Anyway, that’s all for now; I have a lot I want to share about my experiences in Korea… till next time!

Entry 2 – 7/7/2009 – Korea, Korean, and Koreans

by skyrien

The more time I spend here, the more I realize that there is so much that I don’t know about the place, the language, and the people that I had called my home for 7 years. Having spend half of my elementary years and nearly all of my middle school years here, I often feel that I can speak authoritatively about the experience, yet there’s still so much that i didn’t experience while here, and didn’t experience; I don’t think I was ready to, nor willing to do so for fear of losing my American-ness. Things are a little different now; I’m very much established in my Asian-American culture, yet woefully out of touch with the things that make the Korean-American experience unique.

Life here in Seoul is facinating, and I realize that even though I might not understand it all, it’s very much a part of who I am. Despite the sense of “being in a different place” that I feel here, it doesn’t feel at all alienating, or foreign, and the more I spend here, the more I remember that there’s a lot to learn and like. Having travelled a bit over the years, I can finally note a lot of similarities and differences to the cities in Asia, Europe and the U.S. Seoul is definitely a lot more like Beijing than Shanghai, similar to Paris in the sociatal and political spectrum, and vastly different from any American city I’ve been to. You don’t see little kids playing at city parks without adult supervision well past midnight in Seattle; or junior-high girls walking in pairs late into the night across a major city center. It’s such a different kind of city than anything in the U.S. that you just have to see and live it. The size/scale/and proximity of everything forces people to live where they walk and work, and the city, isn’t just a place to go, but it’s very much a part of who they are. I like it here 🙂

Here, I don’t mind the cigarette smoke, the drunk old men on the street, or even the poor beggars petitioning for money as they go by. The old Confuscian heirarchy of society which I had been so strongly against when I was young now suddenly makes sense–and the sense of respect for your elders and your fellow man is so so beautiful to me now. The respect for people working for the public service, janitors and street cleaners even is so strong, that it feels like a society that just works. Despite the income disparities, and corrupt politicians, the overt view is one of a capitalist society balanced with a societal need to support each other. It’s very beautiful in what it can be, and something that I wish I could take back with me to the U.S.

That’s not to say that Seoul is not without it’s flaws; the lack of individualist expression and the fad/mob-mentaltiy to everything puts me off a bit, though I think this is more out of fear of expression than something that’s engrained in people. It’s like the whole popular society revolves around what the “sociatal leaders” say, and these “leaders” tend to be whoever gains the mob first. Trends rise and fall quickly, and despite the stability of the cultural heirarchies, the more transient lifestyles of people tend to change on a whim. The Americas and Europe seem to handle this a little bit more maturely.

Anyway, overall, I would love to spend a year or two out here, understand and contribute my peace to the world here. There’s a lot that I want to learn, and whether I like it or not, it’s a reminder that there’s much more to *being* than me, my hobbies, and my job: there’s also perspective of where you are, how you fit into the people and environment around you, and the world at large–something Aristotle knew very well, and something that’s been missing from my life for quite some time.

My grandmother’s passing and service was a very powerful reminder of the importance of family, parents, and heritage. I had never been to one before, and knew nothing of what it was like outside of movies and books. It was something that I feel unworthy to describe with words, and I won’t even try.