This is one funky quiz…

               

There’s something that’s been bothering me lately, something that came to me in an epiphany while driving home from break. I’ve realized that there is a certain lack of closure in quite a few aspects of my life. And if not closure, definition. I guess it’s the inevitability of actually living—you can’t finish every chapter you start, and as you go along, you write in loose ends and sometimes conveniently forget to write them in. It makes for great story writing, always giving yourself possibilities to expand, but in life, it’s just serves to complicate things. I’m sure [name removed] will have something to say about not being able to escape your past, and of course, you can’t really, but you can try to make it something you can live with, and that’s what I’m going to have to do. As Joe Lewis has said in my Facebook, “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”

Closure in my past is essential to truly moving forward, and I think I need to close some past pages, and finish writing some more in the present. I don’t presume to be able to live perfectly, but I do have this great need to to be at peace with the way things are, and these “loose ends” create ever-present tensions that are never fully addressed. Often, I’m so used to it that I forget, until something happens—something causes it to be brought up again, and then I realize how much it has been an unacknowledged weight on my chest. Other times, it’s on my mind so much that it literally dominates my thought, hindering anything else I need to be doing. Bad conflicts can result from these, and I think it’s time to address the important ones sincerely. Still, I’ve come to realize recently that some Pandora’s boxes are better left untouched… and peace better found between God and I.

TO BE UPDATED SOON: Rohit’s Birthday Events!

And, since I got bored, I did this test again:

It IS break again, and I have so much crap that I need to do. It wouldn’t be fall break without a visit to NU, another NU-UIUC Football game, and yet ANOTHER loss for the Fighting Illini. Something just doesn’t work with our school’s football team: always winning for at least 10 minutes, then faltering, and continuing to falter till the end. With that ending, the bagel in my stomach did not sit well.

This is while we were winning 17-16

After the 27-17 loss…

Oh sure, it was definitely worth going to though. I find it hard to actually care too much about football outside the school-related setting, but something about it being OUR team makes is seem worth caring about. But that’s just me, I’ve never really been a sports buff. If you haven’t gone to a college football game, make it a priority.

Unfortunately, it looks like the rest of this break will have to be less-interesting. There’s a pile of crap that needs to be worked on. I need to make a list, or else I’ll never get it all done. I might as well make some longer term goals as well.

Short term (for break):

• Finish input entities, simulate operation for 385 project. Send to Jason and work on other problems (By Wednesday)
• Read books and work on ethics research essay (worth an entire 40% of our grade).
• Catch the hell up in CS 225. Finish MP (if one is released)
• Learn PHP , make rudimentary uh… program?
• Dive into .net! I didn’t get Visual Studio .NET for nothing!
• Play around with Matlab
• Reinstall 3ds max. Watching that Kiwi video gave me new inspiration!
• Sunday: CCMC. I think I need to.

Mid term (for the year):

• Keep up and get back on top of classes. (Rodeo time!!!)
• Learn two more tie-tying methods. Thanks to EWah for the Double Winsor. Best one yet!
• Work on a simple animation for 3ds max. Render and place on Youtube .
• Gain 15 lbs and get Amephistophelian that funky hat!

Oh, and speaking of hats… I’ve been playing around with new styles, thanks to Capt. Kirk Junior. What do you think?

Long term (for the rest of college) :

• Achieve greatness!
• Win at least ONE of each: A writing, art, and business competition.
• Further the cause of medical neuroscience.
• Get published, dammit! Novel or article, I don’t care!
• More as they come to my head.

Uh, I think that’s enough for now…

Also, regarding the Kiwi animation, there seems to have been a few people that didn’t understand the meaning. Well, look around fools–that animation was deceptively simple in its message.

Yep. Till next time!

By the way, this is a great book, with many insights into why we are who we are.

…she does not think the happiness of a fulfilling life an be won without a realistic willingness to make the effort and pay the costs required. For example, you have to be willing to make a relationship work. What many of her clients want instead, she thinks, is an ideal relationship in which they will be loved completely without having to do anything in return. “This is the person who is going to be there to talk to, to go somewhere with them, or, you know, a person who’s just going to be there and is going to understand them. Most people don’t want to have to tell you how they feel. They want you to divine that. That would be perfection. Someone who would understand them so thoroughly that they would never have to say a word and just always be there for them and who would just make them feel really secure and really, oh not alone.” What people need to accept is that it is ther responsibility to communicate what they need and what they feel, and to realize that they cnnot expect someone else magically to make them happy. “People want to be made happy, instead of making themselves happy.”

More in this book!